We’re on the road
Off to another show
We gotta go
I’ll call you later broEvery year
For about 5 months
To be very clear
I go out and find funds

Time to collect from the many
That are particular with their pennies
They won’t spend a cent
Unless there’s perks and the [bennies]

So I travel in a van
That was down by the river
Go out into the land
Understand I am a giver

Got my quiver full of raps
And I’m ready to attack
Brought along some books
In case I don’t want to nap

We stay at Super 8’s
Dine at Waffle after hours
I like ‘em smothered
Fingers covered in biscuit powder

Seldom shower
Scare the hoes right out the lot
All I need is an apple
Little bit of pot, what you got

My roadie’s got a room
Falls asleep to slasher flicks
He likes Jason over Freddy
If he ever had to pick

We rent a Dodge caravan
It got stow ‘n’ go seating
The road may sound redundant
But it does bear repeating

We’re on the road
Off to another show
We gotta go
I’ll call you later bro

I brought house music
I hate disc jocks
I like cracker barrel
I like the gift shop

I like their pork chops
I like the peg game
I like old people
They all got leg pain

I like rest stops
That’s where dogs shit
I hide behind a tree
And take a bong hit

I like cool ranch
But I’ll take nacho cheese
Oh no, it starts to rain
Pass me my poncho please

Time to mic check
Find the ladies room
It’s always clean and empty
Time to drop a deuce

You never read the news
You grow apathetic
Mic check gives you a headache
Like when you play kinetic

No ones heard of me
Wish I could mercury like T2
Kids say wish I could be you
I suddenly don’t feel so see through

Feeling artsy and []
[]
Did I say kinetic
I meant Wii you play Nintendo

We’re on the road
Off to another show
We gotta go
I’ll call you later bro

Every year
For no foreseeable end
To be very clear
I go out and find friends

They’re everywhere
It makes one’s mind bend
When I was young
I was the one no one would defend

But now kids
Well they get into line
I’ve been to far away locales
Kids still get into line

They’re getting younger every summer
Getting older than wine
Now I’m advising and reminding them
To open their minds

But up on stage
Veins pop out of my face
Sweat pours out my pores
Like this war’s a race

I say put your hands up
No pup is out of place
Then we do rap hands
While I shout ‘bout outer space

Meet and greet is super sweet
Lasts as long as the shows
No cuts, I’ll bust yo coconuts
Back of the line you must go

I’m disarming and I’m charming
And my sharpie is spent
I’m hugging then I duck into the van
Then we jet

We’re on the road
Off to another show
We gotta go
I’ll call you later bro